August 29, 2010

White People Crimes Are So Predictable

I was sitting with my son watching the news and something came to mind.  I don't know if this is just me but, I can almost predict the race of certain criminals based on the crime committed.  I know, I know it doesn't make any sense.  But, I'm more than positive that you can do the same.  I'm going to prove it to you.  White people and Black people crimes are so predictable.  However, there is certain things that a person of color won't even think of doing.


For instance, lover's quarrel male found with gun in mouth and wife's body is found laying beside him.  That is definitely a white person's doing.  You see us black folk are very self absorbed. Granted a black man may have killed a woman but, turning the gun on himself afterwards would not have happened.

Parents found dead and  insurance policy is missing.  Again, a white man.  First of all, half us black people don't even have insurance.  None that's worth offing our parents, anyway.  Now if the headline would've read parents dead after not paying an old debt to son it would've been no doubt a black person.


Kid missing last seen with stepmother.  The police doesn't need any clues.  I figured this out as soon as I seen it.  His white stepmother killed him because a black woman wouldn't even had the kid in the first place.  Shoot, we barely have our own damn kids.  


Last but not least, Man arrested for robbing the check cashing place.  This is MOST definitely a black man.  The majority of Black America don't have a bank account.  


There you have it.  I gave you four crimes that was so predictable.  If you have any you might want to add please share.  Thanks for supporting my site and may you be blessed abundantly.  Peace........

August 14, 2010

Things To Bring N-Word Out Of Anyone



I'm sitting here and reading the lame apology delivered by Dr.Laura Smith for using the word "Nigger".  It's crazy because in the Urban  dialect the N-word is used  very often.  Some of us choose to sustain from using it but the majority of us continue.  I am so guilty of this  and can't make any promises to stop using it.  Some of us argue the fact that it isn't offensive if we say "nigga" opposed to "nigger".  Nigga isn't a word, though.  I guess that makes us a dumb nigger.  The real bizarre thing is that the research of the word "Nigger" is a tedious task to do.  I had to find the definition in the urban dictionary online.  Nigger actually describes an ignorant, uneducated, foolish individual regardless of race, color, religion, sexual orientation, etc.  If this is true then we all have a little nigger in us.  Below is a brief list of things to bring out the nigger in everyone of all races.

  • A cheating spouse.  I don't care what color or beliefs you may practice, if your man/women cheats on you all standards go out the window that very moment.  We become irate and prove the lyrics to that song.  "I'll Bust The Windows Out Your Car"
  • Mistreatment of our children.  When someone hurt our children it is the ultimate disrespect.  In my hood, we're walking on your porch with a jar of Vaseline and four cornrows to the back.
  • Termination of employment.  You can be orange mixed with purple.  If you get fired first thing in the morning not only are you going postal because you lost your job but, they could have told you all of that on the phone before you came to work.
  • The foreign customer service representative at the telephone company.  He doesn't understand you and  vice verse.  However, his reply to each question is "How's the weather there?"  Unbelievable.
  • That annoying telemarketer.  Everyone hates to answer the phone when it's not for them.  You try to get them off the phone politely but, that makes them more persistent.  Therefore, we resort to a more foul choose of words such as, Fuck Off already.
This is a topic that I can go on and on about.  But, it will make this post extremely long.  But, I look forward to hearing your topics.  Thank you guys so much for following and may blessed be stored upon you.  Peace....

Urban Celebrity Gossip

Hello my beautiful people this is a topic that I vowed never to get into when starting this site.  But, our ethnic entertainers and public figures have been bringing so much drama to the media circus.  So let's sit back and either shake our heads or laugh our behinds off.

DMX was released from one of his many prison visits to be once again apprehended by the Crips (boys in blue, police).  Apparently, DMX was speeding in a rented Mercedes Benz just hours after being released from college (prison).  This was just a minor traffic violation and he is scheduled to appear in court for the issued citation.
What the hell is goes through this dude's mind.  I love DMX although I have not the slightest idea of what he's saying the majority of the time.  I'm starting to wonder if DMX has a girlfriend in the slammer.



Laurence Fishbourne's daughter, Montana announces that she would like to be an adult porn star.  This is disgusting.  I don't even want to get into this topic.  So, let's move on.  NEXT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Finally, the silence has been broken about these two break-up.  Not too long after the death of Janet Jackson's brother , Michael Jackson the public was alerted of Janet Jackson and Jermaine Dupri's break up.  No one announced the reasons that they split and left curious people like you and I to make our own assumptions.  Apparently, Janet Jackson dumped Jermaine after finding out that he impregnated a stripper from a Magic City's Gentlemen Club.  Kudos to the stripper and middle finger to the Little Leprechaun, Jermaine Dupri.


As a lot of you probably know Kanye West and Amber Rose are no longer together.  Now that's one couple's break-up of many that no one is heartbroken about.  She was totally not on Kanye's level. She brought hood to his sophisticated world. Apparently, Kanye had a wake up call and came to his senses. He shared with radio personality, Angie Martinez that she isn't the type of woman he wants to have kids with.  Translation readers, he doesn't want his kids born by a slut bag.  Good choice Kanye and best of wishes.


I know that you all are probably tired of the Fantasia attempting suicide over married boyfriend.  But, the thing that gets me with all of this is she's actually being sued.  Thinking with my heart if I was wife I would probably just let it go because time heals all wombs.  However, thinking with my head I would sue as well.  The both of them totally disregard the vows that him and his wife made before God.  Therefore, he nor she will be disregarding this lawsuit or the multiple zero's behind the requesting amount.

Well this is just a little bit of urban gossip for you folks like myself that just like to mind their business.  Ha Ha I had to laugh after that statement myself.  Thanks for visiting and do come back

August 9, 2010

Embarrassing Intimate Moments

We all have had embarrassing moments during intimacy that we would love to forget. Some are more embarrassing than others.  But, still in all they're equally embarrassing.  For instance, breaking wind during sex, horrendous noises, calling out the wrong name.  Sorry, I got a little ahead of myself with that one. However, sometime or another we all experienced this.  I'm more than positive that someone is reading this post and laughing hard inside because they can picture their own experience.


Anyway, I am going to be brave and share one of many embarrassing moments that I have had during intimacy.  It was a Saturday afternoon and I was getting my hair colored for the Bernie Mack (May He R.I.P) show over Atlantic City.  Beings as though I worked in the salon, it wasn't a problem getting my hair colored correctly.  However, Saturdays are the busiest day.  I was finished with my clients and Felicia still had two more clients before she could began the process of coloring my hair.  Me always in a rush took the liberty of applying a bleach product that I've never used before to my hair.  Well, the next thing that I remember was my hair turning a thousand different shades and falling out as I rinsed it.  Now, I have only 4hrs left to get my hair done, speed home to get dressed, and wait for Tida to pick me up.  I went with plan b and shaved my hair completely bald and purchased a wig.  The wig actually complimented my stylish ensemble.  Okay, here comes the disaster.  I was dealing with a guy off and on and we decided to hook up after the show.  He complimented me on my new look which I'm assuming that he thought was a weave.  But, I didn't have the heart to tell him that I was sporting a wig from Ridgeway's Hair and Grocery.  I know ghetto. Smh.......  Anyway, we're now back at his place and I did all types of karate blocks and ducks to keep him from rubbing his hand through my wig.  See by my hair being completely shaved bald  made the wig move from side to side.  Well, we got into it and let's just say ol' boy was a hair puller.  I heard turn over.  I complied.  Then I heard "What The Fuck?"  I turned around just in time to see a horrified facial expression and my wig in his right hand.  I guess it's safe to say that I never been with him in that manner again.  


Okay, I spilled the beans with my most embarrassing intimate moment now share yours.  I know it can't be more embarrassing than mine.  Thanks for following and may you be blessed abundantly.  Peace.........

August 8, 2010

FREEDOM OF SPEECH IS SUCH A CROCK OF BULL



America exercising freedom of speech is merely a contradiction.  I truly believe that America is one of the most hypocritical country ever.  They say we have freedom of speech.  But, they fail to state that with every word we utter that displeases them in some way has repercussions.  If America encourages "freedom of speech" there shouldn't be penalties for some of things that come out of mouths.  Listed below are a few briefs questions that I have regarding "freedom of speech"


Why can't I tell my neighbor that the hired help built their steps too high without them telling me to mind my business?
Why can't I tell my employer to kiss my entire ass without her terminating my employment?
Why can't I tell the crying baby in the market to shut the hell up without her mother whooping my ass?
Why can't I tell my lover that he sucks sexually without bruising his ego?
Why can't I tell my co-worker that she is an ass kisser without stimulating an argument?
Why can't I tell my fellow face book friend that his post suck and he really needs to stop trying to be a face book preacher without him taking offense?
Why can't I tell the annoying old lady that rings the bell every Saturday morning to stop trying to sell me on the Jehovah Witness religion without being labeled as rude?
Why can't I tell my talkative eight year old to shut the hell up without damaging his feelings?
Why can't I tell the nosey people in my life that I really don't give a flying shit about other people's business without being a butt?  That one I'm going to take back because I am just as nosey.


Anyway, I'm more that positive that I made my point.  Think about this topic and post a few of your questions so that we can discuss more.  Thanks for following and may you be blessed abundantly.



August 5, 2010

A HURT SOLE




The first time I seen you I just had to have you.  All women admire how detailed you were.  Some even tried you.  But to no avail.  You didn't fit so well with them.  I put in extra hours to have you in my life.  I don't know about the others.  But, you're a perfect fit to me.  It's always perfect in the beginning.  You were new to me.  You completed my ensemble.  But, problems erupted when you became too comfortable.  I disregarded your value.  I walked all over you.  Then, I threw you to the back of my closet with the rest of them leaning soles.  I tried another one but, so cheap compared to you.  Why go for a carbon copy when I already had the real thing.  For what it's worth I'll vow to never hurt another sole again........



This post is dedicated to my shoes.  If you're a shoe lover as myself or know someone that shares the same passion please send them this post.  Thanks for following.  Be blessed and pass the blessings along.......

August 4, 2010

The First Black President Before Obama

Beings as though August 4th is the birthday of our second black president, Barack Obama I will not only honor him.  I will show appreciation to our first black president, Bill Clinton.  Bill Clinton has truly represented throughout his presidency.  He pardoned some of our baby's daddy. Although, some of whom went right back.  He and Barack are two of the coolest black presidents ever.  I know that some of you are scratching your heads right now.  Some of you are probably saying this, "You idiot, Clinton isn't black". Well my readers, Clinton does or have done everything that a black man loves.  That is play music (his saxophone), smoke reefer, and talk a lot of shit.  You didn't suspect Clinton of being white until you seen his wife, Hillary Clinton's reaction after the famous oval office professional.  Kudos to Monica Lewinsky.  
Thank you guys so much for following and please know that this post is only in fun.  Be blessed and pass your blessings on.  Peace.......

August 3, 2010

HIDDEN TREASURES ABOUT THE BLACK RACE

It kills me how "My people" meaning the black race has invented and accomplished so much over the years and much deserved credit isn't given.  Today, I acknowledge a few things my people created and please do so as well.
My people were the first to transform a country crock spread container into Tupperware.

My people were the first to use an Ashford & Simpson album cover in place of a dust pan.
My people were the first to use a cut-out cardboard with numbers as a license plate.

My people were the first to create a language, perfect the language, and label it "EBONICS"
My people were the first to take shorthand texts and utilize them in an everyday conversation between two people..  I'm talking about OMG, FOH, LMAO, CTFU, LOL, and let's not forget the term "In my______ voice"
My people increased the amount of glassware in household by collecting jelly jars. You haven't had real kool-aid until you drank it from the jelly jar.

Chinese people may have created the idea to sell loose cigarettes.  But, my people were the first to invent the three per person loose rule.



My people were the first to purchase sneakers more expensive than their monthly rent.
My people were the first to realize that keeping your cable on keeps your channels clear without an antenna.
My people invented the changing of the gender sticker on a trespass to avoid paying carfare.


My people are the first whomever sold a bootleg to the actual starring actor, Kevin Hart.


My people are the first to buy a foreign vehicle and hide it from the repo man every night.


After writing this post, I have come to the conclusion that we meaning "black people" are smart, thrifty,and crafty. Thanks for following and may you be blessed abundantly.



August 2, 2010

It's A Pity Party


So many of us has grown comfortable with feeling sorry for ourselves.  I emphasize on the word "US" because sometime or another we like to host pity parties and its the hottest event to attend. I know from experience on both sides host and guest.  Truth is if a person is happy they could careless about you losing your job, husband/wife cheating, or etc.  But, let the shoe be on the other foot.  You will be the best person in the world.  Just a thought people.  Thanks for your support.............

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