March 18, 2010

God Damn Bill Collectors

I hate when bill collectors call you with stupid questions like is Rasheema home? You are not my friend I say Hell No I'm not home. They must hire the dumbest people. This has to be a result from the recession. Okay, read this one. The bill collector call from the bank about your overdraft balance that you never paid them for 2 years prior. Now, that has to be most stupidest crap I ever heard. If I had the damn money to pay you for overdraft fees I would not have overdrafted in the first place. Crazy. Shaking My Damn Head. That isn't even the kicker. The kicker is I overdrafted because I had no damn intentions on paying you in the first place. Guess some drug dealer boyfriend won't be asking me to put a car in my name for him. The funniest bill collectors are the ones that try to bully you into paying them. I have to admit I love screwing with them.
Ms.Kearney when will you be paying this debt? I tell them idiots the 32nd of the following month. One buttface had the nerve to ask if that would be paid through debit or cash. Again, a result of the recession. The best one is when they call and they ask to speak with Rasheema and I go off on them so bad that my own mama get mad. This is me yall, "Bitch, I know you ain't calling my lesbian lover. That's my bitch. I am so fucking sick of you calling here for Rasheema it's a damn shame. Get your own lover you dyke" Man they get off that phone so fast you would think I was spitting fire through the handset. Again, that damn recession. But, the best way to get a bill collector to not call you again is to not let then off the phone. As soon as they ask for you, say "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO NOT RASHEEMA. LORD NOT RASHEEMA. WHY SIR WHY SIR WHY RASHEEMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA" they desperately try to disconnect the call but they can't because I won't let them. HaHaHa now share some of your funny bill collector stories with me. That way we can laugh together. Don't forget to subscribe to my blog. Peace!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

1 comment:

  1. You may need more help than I thought GOD Bless you babe and I Love you. Would have a story for you however I am MIA cant find me right now if they wanted too.

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