Insecure people tend:
- to be very sensitive to critique and respond with defensiveness. They aren’t comfortable enough with themselves to accept that they might be flawed.
- A secure person can handle criticism. They’re open to hearing about ways they might improve. If they disagree with the criticism, they don’t try to argue because they’re happy with whom they are.
- Insecure people tend to talk about themselves constantly, as if they feel like they have to prove themselves. Self-promotion is paramount to over-compensation for doubt.
- A confident person doesn’t need to promote himself. His qualities are displayed naturally by the way he lives his life. Besides, he doesn’t need validation from anyone anyway.
- Insecure people feel threatened by others, and one way to cope with this is to try and squash them. The most threatening person of all to an insecure person is a secure person, because they can sense their power.
- Overly Authoritative
- Insecure people in positions of power tend to compensate for their lack of confidence by taking out their frustrations on their subordinates. They might issue unfair punishments or orders as a way to prove their authority
- Overly Competitive
- Competitiveness is part of a healthy emotional makeup, but over-competitiveness is a sign of a problem. Someone who can’t take losing by making a big emotional display lacks confidence.
- A person who is secure with himself wins or loses with grace. Grace has a lot to do with respecting your opponent, and you can only do that if you are first comfortable with yourself
- A very dangerous coping mechanism for insecurity is buying things you can’t afford just to show off. We can all think of people with huge TV’s, fast cars, and every toy known to man; even though they don’t make much money. People like this tend to run up their credit cards and get themselves into big trouble.
- A secure person doesn’t need to show off. He doesn’t care what other people think about his possessions
- Insecurity in Relationships
- Insecurity tends to be amplified in relationships. In this situation, there is a constant struggle for control and energy
- Interestingly enough, people tend to be attracted to other people at the same level of security. Insecure people tend to find other insecure people to date, and secure people tend to date other secure people.
- A healthy relationship is made up of two secure people who create their own emotional energy and give to their partner. An unhealthy relationship is made up of two insecure people who take emotional energy from their partner.
- Stays in Abusive Relationships
- Remember how insecure people tend to be attracted to each other? Unfortunately, this means that abusive men end up with women who take the abuse.
Have you ever known a woman who has had a string of abusive boyfriends? She ends up falling for one after the other. She has so little confidence that she is convinced that it’s her fault.
A secure woman isn’t afraid of leaving an abusive man. She knows that she doesn’t deserve that kind of treatment. She creates her own emotional energy and therefore she will be fine on her own.
- Overly Sexual
- Sexuality is a very powerful force, as evidenced by the amount of sexual images in our media. Men especially are strongly influenced by attractive women. Some women learn that they can get a lot of attention from men by flaunting their sexuality.
- An insecure woman who is seeking constant validation from others relies on her sexuality as a crutch.
- It becomes her main source of emotional energy and begins to define her.
- A secure woman doesn’t need constant validation. She is confident enough to define herself in many dimensions; not just one.
Let's do something different on this post and list one thing that you can identify within yourself from this list. Please comment openly and sincerely. Thank you guys so much for your support and may you all be blessed abundantly. Peace.